Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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