i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Randomize
