sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
