Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
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