If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Randomize
