I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
