they need to just BURY HIM!
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
