I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
