i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
It's never too late to be topless.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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