Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
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