i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
