I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
