Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
