out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
