thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
