You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
i think i scared a bird with my dick
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
