How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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