You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
