quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
