Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Randomize
