It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
