I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
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