I'm eating all of the evidence.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I want a musical about memes.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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