I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
