areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Randomize
