best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I think your dad took our porno
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
