she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
