So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Randomize
