Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Randomize
