we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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