where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
