He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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