I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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