grandma shit on top of the toilet
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up�
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
We need to get me chipped asap
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
