My hair reeks of homosexuality.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
