I wish I could teleport
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
