Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Randomize
