Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Randomize
