I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
