is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
