They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
