Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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