Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
My penis needs a shock collar
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Randomize
