hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
This beer is not sobering me up at all
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
We are two peas in an std pod
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
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