if i can run in heels then i can drive
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Randomize
