Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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