i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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