I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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