my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
