who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
